WONDERFULL!
What a wonderful day! ... well not so sure about my morning.. but

Wow awesome!
I am so refreshed! Because I remember who I am again...
So much me talk!
I had been focusing so much on myself, myself, myself.
Being so selfish... thinking I have every right to do what brings me the most pleasure...
And... also in that respect, I was trying to also solve all my problems by myself, thinking I WILL be the master of my problems, I will condition myself into who I want to be.
I was so obsessed . so depressed. so unforgiving of myself. so anxious, couldn't sleep, unhappy.
and now I see why!
And even when I prayed, it was all about me, my problems! isn't that ironic? that you can think that you're praying, but you're actually nourishing the habit that binds you, that buries you in yourself and not God?
i should be careful here, because when I prayed, it wasn't all bad :)
and I will continue doing so...but with this in mind.

God is sovereign.
People have always questioned, "If God is the just, good God...why is there so much injustice in the world? Why is there so much evil?"
But Pastor Josh said that we were asking the wrong question. And if you ask the wrong question, you will get the wrong answer.
The right question to ask is: "If God is a good, just God... why hasn't fire from Heaven come down and destroyed me yet? and the rest of humanity?.. for I am so sinful...we all are so sinful..."
...

And very simply, it is because of God's grace.
Because of Jesus' love for us.

God is sovereign.
For him, all things were made, For his glory, are we made.
John Piper said this : "God is most glorified when we are most satisfied in Him."
It really took a lonooonng time for me to understand this. It is phenomenal.
God is being glorified, not us. And its when we are satisfied in Him, and not us.

Another analogy that was really awesome was
that we can be overwhelmed with our problems. focus on it so much.
much like if you take a coin, and place it up to your eye,
the coin is all you see.

But if you put it in the backdrop of the cross, it becomes tiny... almost insignificant.
this doesn't mean to ignore your problems, he said.
Acknowledge them, do what it is right to fix them, but whether you are in season or out of season, in good tidings or bad, acknowledge God, know he is sovereign.
He is in control. There is no problem God cannot handle. (!) God is sovereign.

"be Still and know what I am God."

And we sang... Blessed be your name.
And yes, God, thank you so much for being God,
I love you for your holiness,
thank you so much for your love,
for Jesus' sacrifce...
I praise you because YOU ARE GOD.


.........................................

And I am found in You. :)
I am at peace. You are my Rock!
Thank you for today, for the wonderful people I met.
I love FiCB people too.
Lord, may I look at YOUR WILL and not ... YOUR WILL FOR MY LIFE.
but YOUR WILL.
please give me affirmation in which church to serve.
i want fiCB to grow, I love the people in it, but can I share my life with it? how can i serve there? and ... yes it does take a lot of time, yes something's can be foreign. and whenever I think about church, my mind imagines the walls of kcpc on a foggy morning, in view of the ocean.
Living Water is wonderful as well. It seems fresh, loving, and filled with passionate people for your name. Its also creative and close.
Your will be done. not my will, your will.
Thank you for your word today Lord. what a life changing event. I am so glad because I WAS DYING. Thank you healer!
:)
I want to only live for you!!!
:)
thank you God! You are sovereign! Glory to your name....

Love,
teresa ^^ a child of God